Monday 26 August 2013

The Perils of Optimism

So... Wow... was hoping I'd have pleasant things to write about my holiday, was I?

Actually, let's not be overly dramatic... The only bad part of the holiday, in fact, was that my four year old niece is currently a selfish, vicious diva who can get quite violent if she doesn't get her way. Most of the time, all we got were screams and tears ("I don't wanna [take part in the day's excursion]", often preceded by the lie "I told you...") but, at her worst, she decided to wreck a sand sculpture I has been attempting, simply because I refused to give her a small collection of flat pebbles which I'd collected from Weymouth beach (and the idea behind that was that I would have tried to show her how to skip them on the waterfront).

Even when playing, she can turn violent - she'll punch, kick and swing toys around (I got a plushy unicorn hobby-horse head in the balls!) and throw things. She'll grab and pull at anything she can get her hands on, be it clothing, body parts or hair. She'll demand attention, and insist that it's given just so...

...and there, I suspect, is the problem.

I've observed before that, when there are other adults present, her parents will effectively switch off, focussing their attention on their phones, laptops, books, television... anything but their daughter. At that age, kids just don't understand that there are other things, equally important, that need doing... but they should never be allowed to come to believe that Mummy and Daddy's phones, laptops, books and TV shows are more important.

My brother-in-law had a few stern words for me over playing with his daughter in the evenings, insisting that she needed to "calm down before bedtime". I don't what what planet he's on, but it can hardly be a coincidence that my niece was in bed and out like a light by about 6.30pm on our one 'lazy day' (where we stayed at home all day apart from a walk in the morning, a shopping trip and a visit to the cinema in the evening) after I'd spent most of the afternoon playing with her.

The other downside to the holiday came on our first day out, to the Monkey World Ape Rescue Centre. It was, by necessity, a short day out... it was a Sunday, after all... but, while trying to supervise my precocious little niece, I had to follow her up to the observation tower next to the Orang-utan pens and, right as I got to the top, a long-haired, angst-rock t-shirt wearing teenager blocked the way. It's a small cabin up there but, with other folks milling around and this guy giving the impression that he wanted to walk through me to get downstairs, I lost sight of my niece, so I pushed past. Cue some mutterings with his friends, before he said, out loud, "that jackass just barged past me" (or something similar). Had I not been intent on my niece, lifting her up to the window for a view of the Orang-utans below, I would have been just as loud in pointing out that looking after a four-year-old took precedence over any thought for the self-centred moron who thought that the best way to get down quickly was to block the staircase for those coming up. That pretty much spoilt the day for me, as I spent the rest of our time there on the lookout for the aforementioned moron, and didn't get many photos...

On the whole, the holiday was awesome. We went out almost every day once the whole family was assembled (as per last year, my folks and I arrived at the holiday home on the Friday, my sister and family arrived the following afternoon), visited some amazing places, saw some wonderful animals (a range of simians, horses, sea life, etc.) and had some delicious - and very reasonably-priced - food. My abiding memories of the whole experience are pretty positive, and the best day was, without a doubt, the day we spent at Weymouth, which just happened to be the day of their annual carnival. It was the second time I've spent any significant amount of time at the seaside in about the last 25 years (the first being Skegness last month, when I visited my girlfriend), it was a lovely warm day with a nice breeze, we had a picnic on the beach, ice creams, and a visit to the Sea Life centre. We viewed the gallery of sand sculptures (sci-fi was this year's theme), saw parts of a display by the Red Arrows and, aside from the small-but-destructive tantrum and a fall which prompted much crying (until remedied by a Mini Milk lolly!) the niece was very well behaved.

The funniest part of the day was when my niece basically ran off in the direction of a fairground ride in the sea life cente. I think I was the only one who noticed her dashing in that direction, and I ended up queuing with her, during which time she pleaded with me to ride with her (a necessity anyway, since she's under 1.2m tall!). In a fit of common sense, I phoned my sister to let her know where we were (she didn't sound especially worried), which brought mummy running back to the ride... and instantly the uncle was ousted. The staff on the ride did offer to let me go on the ride by myself (um... nah), or to let niece have a second ride with me (one ride was enough, as the niece got soaked!), which was pretty cool of them.

The most adventurous day by far was the day we went to Poole and picked up the ferry tour to Brownsea Island. Niece was most uncooperative on the way out, but settled down once we got to the island - the site of Baden-Powell's first ever Scout Camp, and home to one of the last refuges for native British red squirrels. Most of the adults in the group took a fairly long walk around the island, visiting views and gift shops along the way, while the niece made a kite in the kids' centre. Sadly, we didn't have time to explore Poole itself but, since I saw at least one amusement arcade on the promenade, that's probably a good thing for my wallet...

And now I'm back, I need to prepare for another weekend away, visiting my girlfriend again before she comes back to town at the end of next month.

On that note, and referring back to the family holiday, it's a bit of a turnaround for me for my abiding memories of anything to be positive. I'm basically an optimistic guy, but generally, I'll remember more of the bad than the good of my experiences... at least, until I met my girlfriend. Perhaps there's just that much more positive stuff to think about now (ignoring my continued lack of gainful employment), or perhaps meeting her and spending all this time with her has had a dramatic and positive impact on my perception of my experiences in the world at large... Food for thought, anyway...

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