Divers Alarums

So we're in our nice, shiny, new office. It all looks really great, but we quickly determined that some of the thinking that went into layout was decidedly squiffy, and didn't really take into account the needs of the department or the individual.

And then, three days in, we discover that the air conditioning isn't 'not working', it's 'not been switched on'. Sure, the little boxes on the wall were on (and on the lowest possible temperature setting)... but the power to the actual air conditioning system had not been activated.

Now it has... and our nice, shiny, new ceiling is leaking in Production. So a small section of our nice, shiny, new office is now cordoned off, with a couple of buckets catching the drips.

Amusingly, the site manager for the office build was escorted from the premises by the security guards today. Not quite sure how that happened, but apparently he's quite a big, imposing fellow, so I'm guessing someone from one of the other offices in our building took an instant dislike to him.

In other disastrous news, my next magazine - going to press on Monday - currently has 13 pages unsold, and 23 flatplanned ads not on the system. Sales blame Admin. Admin blames Sales. Bottom line: Accounts will be very pissed off when I put together the Stop List tomorrow with 13 pages worth of fillers and 23 free ads. I was assured this afternoon that there are good prospects for the remainder of the magazine... but prospects don't mean a thing. Prospects don't pay the bills and, by the end of the day, none of those prospects had turned into a sold advertisement.

This magazine, despite being one of the smallest, never quite manages to run smoothly... but it's been getting worse and worse. Sometimes I feel that I'm being a bit hard on this team, pointing out exactly how bad a state their magazine is in not only to their Commercial Manager, but to the Management Accountant as well... It's not something I've ever done to another team.

But then, I realise, no other team is quite this bad. No other team has presented me with this many unsold pages two days before press. No other team manages to have this many ads 'booked' but not properly entered into the booking system. I'm only feeling bad because I quite like them as people... but they're Salespeople, and I am acutely aware that me liking them just gives them an easier time manipulating me into doing things the way they want, and that has to stop.

I got badly stung a few months ago when, in good faith, I put together their flatplan based on their own, and most of it turned out to be little more than a fabrication. Did I get a grilling for that? Oh yes. Did I give them hell in return? You'd better believe it.

Since then, when I do the first draft, I'll take the Editorial content from the flatplan they draw up, but only place ads that are properly booked in, and warn them that I've done so. The second version of the flatplan will incorporate any ads that have made it onto the system since the first draft, ignoring any updates I've received that do not tally with the bookings. Again, I will warn them that this is so. By this time, invariably, we're getting closer to press day, and my Copy Controller needs to know what he should be chasing that's not yet properly booked, so the third version will incorporate ads that are not on the system, marked as such... And that's where it's just got silly this month.

I need to have a meeting with the Editor and the Sales Manager, because something just isn't working here.