Unexpectedly Weird

Perhaps it's not surprising that, given nearly a full week of work in an actual office, my subconscious thoughts return to my old job, particularly given that we are edging ever closer to the one year anniversary of my redundancy in December.

The length, depth and detail of the dream were surprising, however. Normally, I find dreams swim from subject to subject, setting to setting, blurring into each other like switching TV channels with a fader switch. Not so, this time.

It was almost like being back in the office (though the layout was different, so not exactly the same office) on a press day that was also another 'final farewell' to me and my former boss. We'd been called back (again) to pull their fat out of a particularly fervid fire, but there was a large presentation screen in one area of the office, upon which was scrolling (amongst other things) the text of my last farewell message to the company.

The order of events is a bit messy in my head right now – it was a dream, after all – but things that happened included:

• Me adding a final note of absolute finality to my farewell message (telling those who remained that I wouldn't miss “you fuckers”) which drew a few gasps but mainly laughs.
• Me telling everyone what a useless, lazy tosser one of the Editorial Designers was while he was sitting only a few feet away, and well within earshot. Yes, it was deliberate.
• A long and detailed argument about 'how to be an effective boss' between my former boss and the woman who was in charge of the company when we departed, which started when the latter offered some nebulous words of encouragement at the sight of the former sagging against a cupboard because of some new disaster wrought by the salespeople.

This last point was where it got incredibly complicated. My former boss responded along the lines of “don't you dare 'come on' me... one of the reasons I'm back here again is because you're virtually never in the fucking office.”
“I've got a lot of important meetings to go to,” was the other's cheerily insincere retort.

My former boss argued with great erudition that it was hardly setting a good example for the new staff that the person in overall charge of all their publications was never around, and the other simply prevaricated.

It was just so real, I tell you...